Love is a funny thing. It is stingy. Think about what it takes to love another person. I mean, really love them. It’s hard. Hatred is easy. Look around. Hate is currently destroying the world and it spreads like wildfire. Love, not so much. Yet, humans seem to have a reserve of unlimited capacity for love. We get a spouse and love them. And, if you do it right, it feels like you could never ever love anyone as much. Then you have a kid. And you love them just as much. After that? Its off to the races. You could have a dozen children and love each one with the entirety of your heart (if you do it right). Where does all of this come from? We throw around terms: family, love, friendship, compassion. Trust me, for most of us, it is a punchline. We literally have no understanding of those terms. Throw in some narcissism, arrogance, and self-promotion, and we obliterate any meaning.
Then, this happens.
My best friend is marrying HIS best friend this week. I do not feel like I am losing a son. I feel like I am gaining a second mortgage. It feels like he has loved Sabrina forever. That scares me. So, I watch them. I listen to them. I look for any crumb of understanding. And there it is: Pandemic. Riots. Cancellations. Re-scheduling. Stress. Apartment. Menu. No food! Masks. And through it all, they hold hands. I mean that literally. Look carefully, you can see it. It’s not quite love. That takes 20 years and raising a child (in my view). But it is every raw material that incubates love. They can block out the noise and focus on each other’s happiness. And if that isn’t love, what is?
My most popular piece was about holding him for the last time. (https://ariweisbrot.com/2015/06/10/one-last-thing-before-you-go/). I mourned the loss of his childhood but celebrated the rest of his life. And here it is. Benny is ready. He understands what love is. It is his soul-mate. He understands friendship – – having felt its unconditional best from Solomon, Ari, BennyL, Aaron, Karesh, Yoni, Marc, and of course, his man, David. And his mother. His amazing mother, who loves him more than eternity.
Yeah yeah. Some of you have done this and are yawning. Some of you haven’t done this and are yawning. It takes a great writer to bore ALL of his readers. Guess what? I don’t care. There is so much hate and hostility and divisiveness in the world today. A lot of pain and suffering. Hell, we do not know what craziness comes tomorrow. But, I know what craziness comes next Tuesday: love. And I will take that.