I am not gay, but if I was I would want to get married. Being married isn’t such a big deal. It is just a title and, frankly, most marriages end in divorce or infidelity, and every husband and wife spends at least some time wishing they were not married. But, a perfect marriage is aspirational and who wouldn’t want that? I think planning a wedding as a gay man would be extremely fun and, unlike un-gay weddings, both partners would be actively involved in the planning.
The hot story this week is the commencement of gay marriage in New York. I don’t understand why any heterosexuals care. This is one of those issues that really does not impact anyone other than those whose status has changed. Those who oppose gay-marriage secretly believe that by denying homosexuals civil and human rights, maybe they will change their minds and switch back.
Here’s the problem. Anti-gays think that homosexuality is a choice. Gays believe that sexual orientation is genetic. Both arguments are absurd and were invented in order to defend or vilify gay people. First, no one chooses to be gay. Homosexuals are abused, hated, oppressed, and even killed just because they are gay. For most of history, announcing that you are gay meant a lifetime of pain, misery, and discrimination. Who would choose that? It’s why the image of hiding in a “closet” was invented and still exists today. No one in their right mind would choose that sort of life and yet, over the centuries – – even when being gay meant death – – millions of people were, in fact, gay.
On the other hand, one is not born gay. There is no gay gene. For those who harbor hope that such a gene will be found, keep dreaming. Genetic traits – – even if the actual gene has not yet been mapped – – are consistent. They are hereditary and, with extremely rare exceptions, can be statistically determined and proven. Two parents with blue eyes, will ALWAYS have children with blue eyes. Two parents with brown eyes will have brown-eyed children 75-100% of the time, depending on their own dominant/recessive makeup. Mixed parents will result in 50-75% brown-eyed children, depending on their genetic code. In other words, for genetic traits, there are unflappable statistics that govern the traits of children. There is no correlation whatsoever between the sexual orientation of parents and their children. None. The numbers are so skewed as to demonstrate that, at least genetically, sexual orientation is random.
Thus, one neither chooses to be gay, nor is born gay. So, what determines sexual orientation? I have no idea. But, importantly, I don’t care. Hating gay people just because they are gay is like hating black people or Jewish people just because of who they are. It’s hatred for the sake of hatred. It’s a colossal waste of time and energy. If killing homosexuals didn’t “cure” them, denying them the right to marry probably won’t either. But, along the way, we will spend a ton of time and money accomplishing nothing more than sowing the seeds of hatred and discrimination.
You cannot stop a force of nature. In this case, the force is not sex, it’s love. Why is it a good idea to replace the love of two homosexuals with the hate of those who would stand in their way? Do we really have nothing more important to worry about?
Enough is enough. Let the partying begin.
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